Friday, January 16, 2009

Life ain't always beautiful??


I slept at 9pm last night.I woke up at 630am. Ive been thinking about my life lately.
Scenario
You set your goals in life
put energy into it and try harder to complete successfully, but everything falls apart,unreachable and..all you can do is start all over again?
Ohh..

What should I do? Accept is and believe that there are reasons why?
Suddenly,all this Qs pop up
"bila ni"
"bila lagi"
"cepatla"
"cepat..cepat.."
Guess what, Ive been struggling with this issue long time ago.Balik kampung org tanya..sini tanya,sana tanya! Tired!
Pernah tak terfikir ape yang ada dlm fikiranku?Pernah tak fikir susah senangku?I bet..NOPE. All you can say is.."cepat..cepat..cepat.."
Do you think I am a machine?Push button pastu terus jadi?
Few months ago at my gym.While waiting for my so-called-fav-aunty-at the gym lounge, I overheard this:
Girl A : Do you know one of our gym member tak?Heard kahwin dah 2 yrs, tapi takda anak lagi. Dia planning la tu dulu2.Pastu bla nak payah la tu.. Girl B : Haaa..ada ada..tula ..tuhan nak bagi dulu taknak, skang bila nak payah la tu.
Girl A : Eh, tapi yg mana satu eh that girl?
Girl B: ha..tu kena tanya Girl C sbb dia citer tadi.

You can't possibly imagine how freaked out I was when I heard this.Of course they cant see me because Im not facing them! *smile.OMG..I was so pissed off ! What give you the right to judge me? You barely even know me!??And..are you talking about my fate???Who the hell are you??????!!!!@@#$%^
oops please excuse my languange!

And as I was leaving, I thought I might as well say something..so I did!
Me : Im teribbly sorry but I coulnt help myself..overhearing your chit-chats a while ago.The person that Girl C was mentioning..is me.Im fadd by the way.
Both of them were saying sorry to me.Of course I forgive both of them.But I tell them Im gonna blog about this.And here I am *smile

I am so disappointed right now. Only Allah knows what is the best..believe me, it's really hard for me.Disappointment is perhaps one of the most difficult things to deal with in life.It is painful, but it can inspire me to be a better person. If we let disappointments pile up, they lead to discouragement.As for me, Im turning disappointment in a positive direction, moving myself closer to Allah. No matter how painful my disappointment may be,Allah is trustworthy and I believe in qada' and qadar.

Yups "perjuanganku belum selesai", pinjam kata2 Dr.M.Well, maybe ada betulnya.Ada lagi yg I need to do that doesnt achieve yet.Now, all I need is for you to dua' for me: my happiness, my life...bla bla bla..
There must be hikmah and reasons why... So please dua' that all goes well.I just need a helping hand.Not anything fancy or luxury.Just a dua.
And I hope that's okay.

"We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Love

19 comments:

leeneel said...

Dear..sorry to hear that.

But I just know we've learn how to ignore all those nasty comments from anybody that not even know who we are right??

Sibuk jer nak amik tau pasal org kan!

Love u!

jetsetter said...

Hi dear,
Thanks for ur support.Im not in a good mood now.Hmm..but Im okay.Im trying my best dear.

dialicious said...

Awww..u poor thing..saba byk2 k.I mcm x percaya la bende tu pun dorang nak gosip dlm gym?isk..pelikkan..makcik2 kot.Unless u betol2 popular kt gym tu.Fadd,ur only 26..been married for only 2 yrs..u have a long long way to go.I ni lagilah..husband pun belum ade tau!hehe..just look at the positive side..Tuhan nak bagi u honeymoon lg&kenal ur husband more and more.Rezeki tu akan jatuh tiba2.Dun think about it sweetie!

jetsetter said...

Hi diah!
Thanks!!!appreaciate it so much! :-)

jetsetter said...

Ohh diah..ni bukan makcik!! Ni umo 20's yerrr :-)

Anonymous said...

I've been there. I conceive after 3 years of marriage. Now @ 36weeks waiting for the baby to come out :)

Sabar and jgn pedulikan kata orang. At the same time usaha (clinic etc) and lotsa doa... Insyallah ada rezeki tu nanti :) AMIN

shahi

CikChelsea said...

w'pun umo 20-an..tp mcm makcik...

jom kita panggil dorang makcik2..hahahahah..

whatever it is...i still love u sista :D

jetsetter said...

Sista,
I love you too! You and family always my "tulang belakang" in everything!

Ano,
Thanks for understanding. Kdg2 kita tak kesah, tapi org luar yg presure.kan?sbb tu kdg2 jd kesah.By the way, Im happy for you! and guess what?Bla u drop here.i tiba2 rasa semangat..thanks.U made my day!

The Mrs-Bride said...

fadd dear, dah dah.. ignore jer kata2 tu ekk.. don't have to take it hard k.. take care babe.. insyaAllah the time will come.. prayers with u always! :)

Linda said...

Hi Fadd..

I somehow blog hopping from somewhere and tersampai kat blog u.. :)

u know what?? I've been at your place before. Masa baru2 kawin, i tak terasa sangat coz i tot i can have more time together..

masuk 2nd year.. dah start orang tanya2.. my mom in law siap cakap orang tanya dia so that she had to ask me.. bengang la kan?? hee... i plak period mmg irregular so that susah nak tahu bila waktu2 subur tu..

U can imagine everytime my period lambat, i will go and buy the tester.. and dah abis berdozen2.. ehhe.. sometimes tu.. siap test 2 or 3x selang beberapa hari sebab takut tersalah amik test.. and everytime is negative :(

Alhamdulillah.. nak masuk 3 years tu, masa i tak betul2 mengharap sangat.. baru i discover i pregnant. my son pun actually my dad nazar masa gi haji. kebetulan, masa awal muharram that year, i puasa ngan my hubby.. Rezeki la tu..

So, u jangan rasa stress or hopping sangat2.. rilek je. insyaallah.. tuhan tu maha kaya. yang penting kena sabar..

Hmm.. panjang lebar plak my comment ni.. whatever it is... just have fun the 2 of u sbb bila dah ada anak, u wont rest till they finish schooling :D

Take care!

Anonymous said...

I ada sorg fren, yg kakak dia married earlier few yrs and xdpt anak after kawin 10yrs. But sebab dia usaha non stop...finally end last yr dia dah deliver her own baby.

But kakak tu enjoy the life to the fullest, travel non stop, kumpul harta and everything.

only the rezeki anak yg lmbt.yes mmg pedih telinga ni dgr org tnya as for me after 1 yr baru concieve then..naik gile kan nak menjawab soalan2 laser?the questions will not stop..so just ignore..i dulu lgsg xbalik kg sbb pressure giler...

The more u think abt it, the more pressure u will be. Then when u stop thinking InsyaAllah...

opss sorry yer pjg giler.last but not least..stay tough yer.

Erna Masfiza said...

hi, i pun sama cam you, dah kawin dekat 3 years tapi belum ada rezeki.

I pun penah kena mcm tu. org tanya 'bila lagi?'. i jawab 'jgn tanya i tanya la Tuhan'. Tak kuasa nak layan...huhuu.. So u sabar ja la k..:)

jetsetter said...

Linda,
Hi there! Thanks sgt2.Yups, bila baca cerita org, at least kita cam ada support sikit kan.
Well, in this case, I am so lucky, my mom in law sgt supportive.She always be..hmm..sabar kot?! Ntah I tatau the right words, but I tau she is :-)But bila dgr cerita u..I suka :-)

Ano,
Hmm..that's a good story.And,when I share mcm ni dgn semua at least I rasa lega.Ada jugak org paham :_)Btol kata u..kena relax kan?Tula..btul tu..jgn nak pressure kan.Thanks anyway.Ur words make me stronger!!!

Anita,
Biasa la..luahan perasaan di hari Jumaat!hahahha

f.i.e.z.a said...

fadd dear,

jgn risau2 sangat k.i know how u enjoy ur life and im glad dat ure now very happy w aman.mana tau lmbat2 ni dapat twins kan..
doa byk2 k..my bro yg dah kawen 6yrs pun dah imun dgn soalan camni.
ramai org sayang u fadd and we all will always pray for u.. :)

tiemie said...

sabar ekk...i pun rasa apa yang awak rasa...

my previous gynae sampai nasihat i kalau balik kg jumpa makcik2 tu salam n blah jer...

they said like making baby tu 'senang' ker...selain usaha kita sumenya dotentukan Allah kan...


sabar ekk...

jetsetter said...

tiemie+Fieza,
how lovely! Thanks :-)
and of course, Im enjoying every moment of our life! best gitu.
heheh

mimielola said...

Oh Babe,.. I respect you cos you had the courage to talk to the girls.

Be strong and be patient. I know it's easier said than done but, I couldn't say much.

mrsazi said...

hai fadd..

i been ur silent reader for quit sometimes.

i yg baru kawin tak sampai setahun ni pun rasa dah bila susah dapat baby (by the way, im have PCOS). tension sgt. tapi, macam yg u cakap, Allah knows best :) and i belived in that.

anyway fad, have u try LPPKN? my fren sister dah 10 tahun tak dapat baby. then pegi sana, baru ok. ada jugak gyn somewhere in kajang, dia pun ok jugak.

panjang pulak kalau i nak terangkan dlm ni, just feel free to drop me an email kalau u nak further info..

take care!

salzahari said...

i blog hopping from M.o.T..i'd friend yg first 2yrs dia mmg plan, just to finish her master study.then Allah nak duga,bila dia nak everytime she conceived she miscarriage at 2-3months.

now her 5th pregnancy, in 24weeks.. pray the best!

org leh kata mcm2...tak fikir kita usaha.bkn kita dok saja! takpa..take ur time & enjoy!!

emm..mcm Linda kata, abah dia nazar. mcm i, lps i lost my 1st susah sgt nak conceive the 2nd becoz of the irregular period, amik pills jumpa gynae hampir nak buat IUI dan opt retro.uterus tu, time Allah nak bagi tu mmg i stop from any treatment,alhamdulillah berkat doa pakcik i gi haji dan Awal Muharam ;)

doa dan doa....usaha.........even my husband cousin, dah 5thn cuba mcm2 dah IUI 3-4x and she even went for the retro.opt plus umrah,Allah belum kata rezeki dia. tunggu jerlah!

Allah sentiasa mendengar doa org2 yg sabar!